ADD-er's Guide to Planning Weddings

If you are an adder, you'll have problems with executive functioning and what's known as working memory. According to Wikipedia, working memory is:

"the ability to actively hold information in the mind needed to do complex tasks such as reasoning, comprehension and learning. Working memory tasks are those that require the goal-oriented active monitoring or manipulation of information or behaviors in the face of interfering processes and distractions."

Yep, that sounds about right.

Now, weddings are complicated things. You need to work with a lot of information at once and there are lots of things that need to happen at the same time and be co-ordinated and by the time you've sorted out the venue, the catering, the flowers, the cake, the timing, the celebrant  and OH MY GOD SO MUCY STUFF HOW CAN IT EVER ACTUALLY WORK GNYAAAAAAGH!!!!!!!

Even NTs have trouble coping coping with a lot of info, but when you have ADHD it's nearly impossible. It's hard enough trying to hold on to one thought, let alone juggle 7.

So, here is my main piece of advice for planning something like a wedding (but it applies to any big event):

PALM AS MUCH OF THE RESPONSIBILITY OFF TO OTHER PEOPLE AS YOU POSSIBLY CAN.

I mean it. Seriously. Get other people to do stuff. For instance:

Get a venue that also does catering. Suddenly, you don't hvave to think about how long the caterers will be there, how much they charge per hour, whether you can afford to have them there for most of the party and whether you can afford to let your guests have no food for that first or last hour (I don't recommend ever having hungry guests, especially if they're European; you'll never et invited to anything ever again).

Get someone else to the decorating. If the venue does it, brilliant! If not, then ask either family or the bridal party to be responsible for it, just make sure you give them a colour guide and a budget.

Get someone to drive you around. If you can get someone to drive you to hair and make-up and all that stuff, then so much the better, because trying to figure out how to get your car home after you've gone to the honeymoon is the kind of information overlaoad that had me wanting to curl up into a ball in the corner.

So yes. Very defintely, make this your mantra for organising anything more complicated than a movie night:


PALM AS MUCH OF THE RESPONSIBILITY OFF TO OTHER PEOPLE AS YOU POSSIBLY CAN!!!