Monday, February 28, 2011

Still more female TMI

I'm here to whinge to you all about thrush.

No, not this little guy that I found on the internet. Though he is a lot more pleasant to look at. The picture is from this site.

Thrush is a naturally-orruring yeast.  It is kept in check by naturally-occuring bacteria. When you take antibiotics, bacteria die. Thrush sees its opportunity and GOES INSANE.

Last year, I had to take four days off work because I had it so badly that I couldn't walk. Peeing was so painful that, on the second day of my confinement (I started having symptoms a few days before it became crippling), I nearly threw up and then nearly passed out.

Even a standard infection is itchy and burny and just generally unpleasant. WHY IS IT EVEN THERE?? I'll bet no one even knows what this damned yeast actually DOES. I'll bet that the only reason those bacteira exist is to keep the thrush in check. I can just see it*:

Bacterium 1: Why are we here, Syd?
Bacterium 2: Ah, the fundamental question of the universe! Why are we here? What is our purpose? How...
B1: No, no no! I mean, why are we here? In this dark, damp place?
B2: Oh! Well, to keep those guys over there in line!
B1: Well, why are they here?
B2: Well, I guess they're here so that we have something to do...
B1: So what you're saying is that they're only here because we're here, and we're only here because they're here. Would anyone even notice if we all just left??
B2: ...

*Inspiration for this dialogue was taken from Red vs Blue, because that show rocks.


  1. Is "thrush" what us Americans call a yeast infection?

    Best treatment I've found: capsules of boric acid (which is NOT the same thing as borax). You usually have to make them yourself by buying empty capsules and the boric acid powder, but for less than the over-the-counter "monistat" crap, you have enough to treat years' worth of infections.

    You just pop one in every morning and every night. They don't sting unless the infection is severe, and then they still don't sting much. None of that greasy crap. And the infection is gone in a few days.

    If I think one might be starting, I'll put one in, almost always nips it in the bud.

    I found the supplies at a health food store.

  2. You couldn't have used a picture of an Australian thrush? :-p

  3. Are you thinking what I'm thinking, B1?

    I think I am, B2.